by Billy Collins
Each one is a gift, no doubt,
mysteriously placed in your waking hand
or set upon your forehead
moments before you open your eyes.
Today begins cold and bright,
the ground heavy with snow
and the thick masonry of ice,
the sun glinting off the turrets of clouds.
Through the calm eye of the window
everything is in its place
but so precariously
this day might be resting somehow
on the one before it,
all the days of the past stacked high
like the impossible tower of dishes
entertainers used to build on stage.
No wonder you find yourself
perched on the top of a tall ladder
hoping to add one more.
Just another Wednesday
you whisper,
then holding your breath,
place this cup on yesterday's saucer
without the slightest clink.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Brunette once more!
I got tired of red... and besides, the itch to bleach a chunk of my hair and cover it in Special Effects Pimpin' Purple or Electric Blue has been growing stronger. I can't very well do that with Crayola Red hair, can I?
Also, super happy thing -- tomorrow is the first day in weeks that Jeremy and I have both been scheduled to be off! I don't think we've had an entire day off together since the day we helped his parents finish packing for their move to California at the beginning of April. We had originally planned to take a trip to Bridge Street Town Centre in Huntsville to see an evening showing of The Avengers in the 21+ theater at the Monaco, but the local ticket prices are so much cheaper that we'd rather have a meal out, go to a matinee showing, and skip the two hours of round-trip travel time. We are so ready for a day of relaxation and nerdy superhero movies!
Also, super happy thing -- tomorrow is the first day in weeks that Jeremy and I have both been scheduled to be off! I don't think we've had an entire day off together since the day we helped his parents finish packing for their move to California at the beginning of April. We had originally planned to take a trip to Bridge Street Town Centre in Huntsville to see an evening showing of The Avengers in the 21+ theater at the Monaco, but the local ticket prices are so much cheaper that we'd rather have a meal out, go to a matinee showing, and skip the two hours of round-trip travel time. We are so ready for a day of relaxation and nerdy superhero movies!
Friday, May 11, 2012
TGIF
Working where I do makes it easy to lose sight of what's important. As is typical of (I imagine) every person who has a job in customer service, I spend eight hours a day interacting with people who are in some way dissatisfied. Their order hasn't arrived, their item was damaged, they typed in the wrong address, their credit card declined and they're insulted because we didn't ship their order anyway... I could go on with more detail, but you get the idea. I am completely and utterly immersed in negativity each and every day, via email and phone calls.
I read somewhere once, before I started this job, that most people who work in a customer service call center don't stay more than 2-3 years. I completely understand why that is. When I began working here, I was perky and happy on every call and I bent over backwards to help every customer, rude or not. Now, on my especially 'meh' days, I don't even care whether the nice customers get help. It wears you down and you get so frustrated with fighting against your own company to try to help the customers they claim to care so much about, you just eventually give up, conform to their crappy rules and policies they put into place, and you stop trying to make customers happy... and that really isn't fair to the customers who truly need your help (only those customers, though -- to hell with the ones who scream and yell and call you names and throw fits that would put TODDLERS to shame).
The only phrase I can think of using to describe what the job has done to me is "kicked puppy" syndrome. At first I was bouncy and happy and eager to please, but people have been so terribly mean (USUALLY unjustifiably, though there are customers who have justifiable complaints who fly off the hinge when we tell them we are unable to help them without breaking policy) over the past two and a half years I've been here, I basically pick up every phone call with a guarded mentality, and I feel that just about every person I speak with is out to get something for nothing. That is not a good philosophy to adapt, because it makes you bitter and it makes you dislike people in general.
It has begun affecting my off-time. When I'm off, and I'm at home, I don't want to see or speak to anyone unless it's Jeremy (bless his precious heart -- the man is my only solace). I don't go out when I'm off, I don't socialize unless it's via text, and you can forget about reaching me by phone on an off day. Part of that could very well be because I'm still a completely over-the-moon newlywed, but mostly I feel that it's because of my numerous interactions with people who are jerks on a daily basis that I decline to socialize even with people whom I know to be good friends and positive influences.
I think it's time for a job change. Hopefully something can shift around soon. Jeremy has some promising job leads -- one local, a couple of others out-of-state -- and if he gets any of those, I wouldn't really have to work unless I wanted something to pass the time when he's not around. Being married to a chef is tough -- six days a week, 12-14 hour shifts... it really stinks not being home during the time he gets to be home! A girl can only clean and read so much! If I get a part-time job and go back to school (which is what he wants me to do), I think I'd be happy as a clam. Truthfully, I could be a "professional student" - haha. I loved college, despite how much I used to gripe about it. I truly do love to learn. I'd take a class every semester from now until I die and I doubt I'd run out of fun classes to take or things to learn. I'm such a nerd.
Anyway. The entire point of this entry, aside from venting frustrations, was going to be that I am actively trying to see the positive in things. I don't want to be a Debbie Downer. I don't want to be one of those people who has something snarky or judgmental to say. I want to be fun to be around and enjoyable to talk to. I want to continue to appreciate little things and see beauty in every day life. When my ability to do these things is challenged, it gets me down, and I know it's time for a change... and I feel that changes for Jeremy and I are coming very soon.
I read somewhere once, before I started this job, that most people who work in a customer service call center don't stay more than 2-3 years. I completely understand why that is. When I began working here, I was perky and happy on every call and I bent over backwards to help every customer, rude or not. Now, on my especially 'meh' days, I don't even care whether the nice customers get help. It wears you down and you get so frustrated with fighting against your own company to try to help the customers they claim to care so much about, you just eventually give up, conform to their crappy rules and policies they put into place, and you stop trying to make customers happy... and that really isn't fair to the customers who truly need your help (only those customers, though -- to hell with the ones who scream and yell and call you names and throw fits that would put TODDLERS to shame).
The only phrase I can think of using to describe what the job has done to me is "kicked puppy" syndrome. At first I was bouncy and happy and eager to please, but people have been so terribly mean (USUALLY unjustifiably, though there are customers who have justifiable complaints who fly off the hinge when we tell them we are unable to help them without breaking policy) over the past two and a half years I've been here, I basically pick up every phone call with a guarded mentality, and I feel that just about every person I speak with is out to get something for nothing. That is not a good philosophy to adapt, because it makes you bitter and it makes you dislike people in general.
It has begun affecting my off-time. When I'm off, and I'm at home, I don't want to see or speak to anyone unless it's Jeremy (bless his precious heart -- the man is my only solace). I don't go out when I'm off, I don't socialize unless it's via text, and you can forget about reaching me by phone on an off day. Part of that could very well be because I'm still a completely over-the-moon newlywed, but mostly I feel that it's because of my numerous interactions with people who are jerks on a daily basis that I decline to socialize even with people whom I know to be good friends and positive influences.
I think it's time for a job change. Hopefully something can shift around soon. Jeremy has some promising job leads -- one local, a couple of others out-of-state -- and if he gets any of those, I wouldn't really have to work unless I wanted something to pass the time when he's not around. Being married to a chef is tough -- six days a week, 12-14 hour shifts... it really stinks not being home during the time he gets to be home! A girl can only clean and read so much! If I get a part-time job and go back to school (which is what he wants me to do), I think I'd be happy as a clam. Truthfully, I could be a "professional student" - haha. I loved college, despite how much I used to gripe about it. I truly do love to learn. I'd take a class every semester from now until I die and I doubt I'd run out of fun classes to take or things to learn. I'm such a nerd.
Anyway. The entire point of this entry, aside from venting frustrations, was going to be that I am actively trying to see the positive in things. I don't want to be a Debbie Downer. I don't want to be one of those people who has something snarky or judgmental to say. I want to be fun to be around and enjoyable to talk to. I want to continue to appreciate little things and see beauty in every day life. When my ability to do these things is challenged, it gets me down, and I know it's time for a change... and I feel that changes for Jeremy and I are coming very soon.
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